I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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