there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
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I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
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Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital