he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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