we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
