I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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