Is it normal to miss your booty call?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
