People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
