Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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