the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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