Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
