Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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