i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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