It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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