Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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