Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
