Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
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