Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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