return my video game
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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