is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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