We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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