Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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