I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize