yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
