I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
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