she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
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I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
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I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.