There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Dating After Heartbreak
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.