my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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