i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
