She announced her abortion via fbk
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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