laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
