She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
