Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
