hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
