i just identified you from a description of your pipe
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
