Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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