I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
