so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
