i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Soap is not a condiment
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
