If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
