this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
