I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
