My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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