Plan B is the new Plan A
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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