i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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