you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
