Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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