covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
