Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
We got so high we made milksteak
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
