Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
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How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
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Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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