I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
