I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
there was a trapeze. enough said
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
