I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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