I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
